So I like the lore of Magic the Gathering. The story has several planes, all with their own logics, physics, and creatures. However, the actual writing is pretty hit or miss for me. A lot of this comes from the fact they appeal to a literary style, and also the arc-based series have different writers per part. This would make sense if there's a team effort, but I swear they're like animators - they just say "here's this scene" and get working.
Instead of being biased, I'm gonna approach this one piece I've found called "The Oracle of Ephara". I'm gonna analyze the prose and the structure. I've only skimmed the start and end of the story.
"Iris, the Oracle of Ephara, leaned forward in the wooden armchair and carefully probed the small side table until her fingertips touched the clay drinking vessel. She gingerly lifted the cup to her mouth, a thin stain of purple remaining on her lips as she tentatively placed the cup back on the table."
Okay so this is our start. I hate this opening paragraph, as this doesn't establish any situation, just that she's at an armchair. I know a lot of writers who speak a lot and say little. Like, the clay drinking vessel? You mean... a cup? And speaking of which, look at how awkward that last sentence is. Using the same words twice in a paragraph evokes the same stumbling as forgetting the last step of stairs. And the process of the cup is so intricately explained without merit. Yes, she puts the cup back on the nightstand, I get that. Personally, I just take a sip, before pouring on the nearest cat I see.
""I do not want to run and hide like a fawn," she said. "If we are to avoid war with those who have sided with the other gods, then I must be here to interrogate captives. You know my gift of foresight only comes from a touch. I cannot be of help if I am hiding far away.""
Okay, why is she explaining something the other person apparently knows?
""The enemies' agents have infiltrated the city," said Perisophia, the current head of the ruling council of philosophers known as the Twelve. The Twelve were arrayed in a circle in the center of the great hall of governance. Iris could hear their voices echo off of the massive marble pillars that stretched to the dome far above their heads.
"If you are captured or killed," Perisophia continued, "then you will be of no help to Meletis or Ephara. If we are to avoid open conflict among humankind, we must also prevent the renegade factions loyal to Purphoros from provoking it. We have conferred with the Temple and agreed that you will be moved to the garrison at Soli, where you will be safe until we call for you. The decision is final.""
Okay this is establishing where we're at. This must be a city meeting, and there's religious war ensuing. I'm not entirely sure who Ephara is, but obviously that's the person Iris is oracling for. That's the external part of the story, but they also establish the internal struggle, which is that Iris wants a fight, but cannot because she's so important.
From here on out, I'm only gonna summarize instead of posting many full passages. This is because, for one, you can read the story yourself, but also because that would take hours. Iris will be escorted by a singular guard to the garrison. After questioning Perisophia, she says the guard will be special. These stories include images, and they show this man as the guard for Iris.
Akroan Skyguard | Art by Mark Winters
Alexio the Skyknight. Meletis is the name of the city by the way. Iris promptly begins rubbing him all over the body with a startling lack of consent before she gets a vision.
" It was more like a feeling, like being in Alexio's dream and feeling the same emotions as he. He was in love with her. Not now, of course, for they had just met, but sometime in the future. And she felt him being taken from her, and his sadness, and then his nothingness.
The thought repulsed her. Not because he was repulsive, but because she knew how it would end. He was an exalted soldier of the polis and she was a blind oracle of Ephara. Never in a thousand years could they be together. If his love for her would kill him, then she must prevent it."
We now have another internal conflict by the fact she must protect Alexio. Kinda seems like a suicide angle with the idea of he's taken away, he grows regret, and then there's nothingness.
"Perisophia let go of Iris's hand as Alexio led her horse away, through the city, out the stone gates and onto the road south. They avoided the highway, taking instead the smaller, more ancient path through the forest. By the end of the day, they would be at the foot of the mountains they would have to cross in order to reach the garrison."
Forest | Art by Adam Paquette
What is so weird and I still haven't gotten over is how they described the mere act of picking up a cup, but when they enter the forest primeval, nothing.
Both talk as Iris mentions being abandoned by the gods who are now uncaring.
""Many believe that soldiers are born for battle," Alexio said. "But it is not always the truth. I would give anything to avoid war. I would rather converse with you by the fire, goblet in hand, than die on a battlefield for gods' own reasons."
"Does not your training teach you that you are already dead?" she said coldly in an effort to keep her emotional distance. "That is how a soldier must wake up every morning—with the certainty that his life has already been sacrificed.""
Iris' emotions feel much more real, she's fencing herself off so she can't hurt someone. On the inverse, Alexio is already on the smoochy smoochy. Alexio goes scouting ahead.
She spurred her horse into a trot, feeling relief in the freedom from the city, from the oppressive magnitude of the government and its imposing stone, its formal customs and grave responsibilities. She quickly offered a prayer for safety and encouraged her horse into a gallop that it was eager to oblige.
The warm wind of the afternoon whipped her cloak and peppered her face. She actually laughed for the first time in ages, holding the reins loosely in one hand and gripping the pommel of the saddle in the other. The landscape of her mind flew by. She could hear the trees pass on either side. Everything felt gloriously out of control. It was the first time she had been alone without an escort or handler in ages.
"Iris!" she heard Alexio shout from somewhere above. Before she even had the chance to rein in her horse, Alexio's powerful arms swept her out of the saddle and carried her through the air before roughly depositing her onto the grass. She heard her horse neigh violently and cry out. She heard the ringing of Alexio's sword as it left the scabbard and the shouts of two other men as they were cut down by his blade, one of them putting up a fight, sword to sword, before being silenced. Quiet returned to the world, except the labored breathing of her horse some distance away.
Well that was alarmingly quick. The brief bit of almost whimsy writing had some good, but wow Alexio just grabbed her.
Anyway, Alexio saw two highwaymen who were actually servants of Purphoros. They tripped up the horse with wire, breaking the leg, so they walk on foot. Iris curses herself for getting caught up in her own thoughts.
""It is not true, Iris," he replied, squeezing her hand so gently she wasn't sure it was even intentional. "You were only enjoying a fleeting moment of freedom that most people take for granted their entire lives. Not only do I not blame you, I respect you all the more for it. Your life is not so different from mine, always in service to Meletis, never to ourselves.""
A theme here seems to be responsibility. I'm getting a strong impression of how Iris is just insanely coddled in her life because of her blindness and importance. Iris soon tells him how she doesn't need him leading her the entire time, nor does she need him flying her away.
A Purphoros commander figures out where Iris has been, giving a sense of urgency of the plot as the enemy is on top of them.
"By the time full daylight filtered down through the trees, they had reached the foothills of the mountains. They had already travelled many miles, Iris, again, refusing to be carried aloft in the arms of Alexio. He led her off the path to the base of a large tree, where he bade her to sit and eat while he went to look for a mount. She was grateful for the rest. Spending most of her time in the luxuries of Ephara's Temple, she was not used to this much travelling.
Leaning against the moss-covered trunk of the tree in a beam of sunlight with food in her belly, she could not help but to drift off to the dream world for a moment.
She awoke to the sounds of a horse whinnying and the deep beating of large wings. She could also hear Alexio's smaller wings beating down to the ground nearby. She recognized the particular quality and cadence of the way he landed, but she did not recognize the other set of wings. The sunbeam was gone, and in its place a cold shadow lay across her body. She could smell moisture in the air. (Clever, smelling moisture.)"
The poetic writing actually works sometimes. This is occasionally awkward in my opinion (They had is said twice in the first paragraph, and travelling is said twice, also the middle paragraph is really long,), but in some cases, the idea shows through.
Loyal Pegasus | Art by John Severin Brassell
The fantasy art is pretty epic a lot of the time. I also think the writing portrays the lack of sense fairly interestingly, not focusing on the sights but on the sounds. A lot of people don't realize they write in third person limited perspective, which is written like both first and third person. You use "Cyras ran down the stairs", but by Cyras' own perspective.
Iris has fun getting on a flying horse and asks Alexio what the scenery looks like. Soon rainfall comes and washes over, so they retire.
Meanwhile the commander, with a magic goblet, sees where Alexio and Iris are at.
""Lady Iris," he said after a drink, "I am glad you talked me into stopping. Seeing you glow in the firelight, warm and dry, is a beautiful contrast to the weather outside. Let's enjoy one more night of freedom before we must resume your duties."(...)
" In that moment, she realized that her vision of his fate was incomplete. She had seen him fall in love with her, and be taken away, but she had not seen her part in the prophecy. Had the gods decreed this, or could her own actions change the future? What if they could be together, flying free over the world? Perhaps if she loved him back, she could change his fate—and he, hers.
She tilted her head toward him and parted her lips. No, she thought, this cannot be. But the aching inside her pushed its way out. Before she could control herself, she felt his lips touch hers. He wrapped her in his strong arms and laid her down on the blanket next to the fire."
For two people who just met they are getting freaky pretty quickly, so maybe they just fall in love easily.
"Eventually, she fell asleep in his arms, wrapped in a warm blanket by a gently crackling fire, a smile on her face and a warm glow in her belly. In the moment, right before the dream world took her, she felt happier and freer than she had ever been, or thought possible."
Well the word "warm" comes up twice.
They awaken with the sound of invaders. Alexio tells her she must go.
""I won't leave you," Iris replied, desperately, the horrible thought sinking in that she was completely helpless.
Another arrow twanged through the cavern, this time finding its mark. Iris shuddered as she heard the shaft sink into something soft. Alexio grunted and continued to struggle in the spider's web.
"Take my hand," she cried, reaching out into the dark, touching nothing.
"I have cleared the web. Your mount knows where to go." His voice quivered, he gasped.
"Please," she cried. The pegasus shifted forward nervously, barely able to hold back.
"Fly," he shouted, slapping the pegasus's (Pegasus' is proper. Technically pegasus's is fine, but if the word ends with an s, we just add an apostrophe) rump with the flat of his sword. (Low-key perspective swap. To fit more in with her perspective, something like, "'Fly,' he shouted, as Iris heard a slap on the horse's rump from a metal sword," may be more advisable.)
The pegasus took a mighty leap across the cave entrance. Iris could feel the temperature and pressure change as they crossed the threshold of the cave. With a massive beat of wings they were airborne into the rainy sky."
And now both Iris and Alexio are separate.
"For the first time in her life, she had tasted love. For the first time in her life she had experienced enough freedom to even hope for love, and Alexio was dying for that love. If she returned to her old life, to grow old and die in servitude, his death would be for nothing.
She turned her mount, not toward the garrison at Soli or toward Meletis, but westward into the unknown. The Oracle of Ephara flew blindly through the rain toward freedom, unseeing and alone, as she had always truly been."
And that's the end of the movie.
So most of this story centers on Iris, a girl who feels mostly alone in her life. I feel like if I cover another Magic story, I won't go passage by passage.
I do like how they played around with the idea of blindness, but the romance unfolds so quickly as does the idea of fate. Like, she couldn't have met this guard prior, instead Alexio has to be someone she just met. Some working around like him being an old college buddy would work (yes that's partly a joke but also partly for real).
Unfortunately, despite an actually pretty awesome sequel hook, there's no sequel I can find so far.
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